OK — who likes change? Show of hands. A-ha. Just as I thought.

There are some people who love change, but most of us hate to have our lives thrown into turmoil. Yet change is one of life’s few constants.

Everything changes. Phases of the moon, seasons, tides. Acorns change into oaks. Flowers
turn into seeds. And yet when it comes to personal change, the things that take us out of our comfort zone, we tend to act like the world is coming to an end.

And it is. At least, the world as we knew it. But as gut-wrenching and upsetting as change may be, you do have a choice:

Controlling change

Consider three basic concepts – accept, adapt and act – to help you react beneficially to the changes going on in your life.

Accept

Change isn’t necessarily bad. It’s just different. It’s all in how we frame it. Is it bad that the acorn changed into a tree? Is either condition – or any step along the continuum – “better than” any other?

Personal change can be very good. It keeps us young (at least in heart and mind), agile and open to new experiences, people and things.

Accept your role in managing change. You can be a victim or you can take charge of your own life. Which will it be?

Adapt

For those of us who are invested in always being right, change can be extra difficult.

We believe that if we change, we’re somehow admitting we’ve been wrong. Being wrong can be more gut-wrenching than actually making the change.

Abandon the whole right-or-wrong dichotomy. Rarely is anything in life either-or. Make it easier on yourself by admitting there may be a better way, or even multiple better ways. Be willing to explore different possibilities.

Understand why your life is changing. Are outside influences impacting you? Is it something going on internally? Chances are it will be a combination of things; you need to know what they are so you can map out a plan for dealing with them.

Attitude is everything. How can you take the challenges you are facing and turn them into opportunities? You CAN do that, you know.

Do you feel better being stuck or moving forward with your life? The choice is yours.

Roll with it. Be flexible. Just like a tree, if you can’t bend in the wind, you will break and die.

Act

Let change liberate you from the things that have been holding you back.

Go back to zero. Based on your past experience, ask yourself: Knowing what I know now, what will I do differently going forward? Because you cannot change what is past, just influence what is to come.

Use this information to examine your personal life and relationships, and work experiences. Build that information into your choices going forward.

Grow yourself. Do you need to learn new skills to keep your job?  Or change your attitude or behavior to keep a loved one close?

Do regular reality checks. See where you are, measure it against your plan and adjust as necessary. You may need to take a different path, or even start over. It’s not as awful as you fear.

And who knows? Maybe the massive change forced upon you turns out to be a blessing.

Think about it: Do you really want to be a little nut all your life?

What big change has happened to you that was the best thing that ever happened?